A Cryptic Beer Review

A cryptic beer review of Dark Horse Kmita KolschI bet you thought you would be going without any beer reviews again for a while.  Well fear not my friends because I haven’t forgotten you, and the beer will keep flowing here and the beer reviews will keep being posted.  Case in point, this particular cryptic beer review from me, of a beer from Dark Horse Brewing Company.  This my friends is the Kmita Kolsch.  What on earth is Kmita Kolsh? As they explain it,

“It’s our way of poking fun at the German purity law and those that insist beer has to be brewed to “style”. These Eastern European hops create a wonderful bitterness and aroma giving this beer a clean, crisp and dry flavor that works well with the mild sweetness from the malt. This beer is fairly light in color and body with mild flavors of malt and toasted malt. The aroma is hoppy, as well as the finish flavor of the beer.”

Sounds good to me. And as someone who has been pretty “meh” about kolsches in the past I have to agree that what they have done here feels right.  It feels fun with just a little bit of an edge to it.  Where as most times that I see a kolsch on the menu, I have to admit that i think to myself, “Self, do you like a kolsh?  I’m not sure, I can’t remember.”  And I think that that is because most of the time they are pretty unremarkable and quite forgettable.  But Dark Horse has gone about this right and made a kolsch to remember.  Check out my Cryptic Review of Dark Horse Kmita Kolsch after the break. Continue reading

A Cryptic Beer Review

A Cryptic Beer Review of Brewery Vivant EscoffierSometimes I find a beer to review that has a certain, experience, to it.  I don’t mean the bottle of rolling rock that has been sitting in the back of your dad’s fridge for years, watching the leftovers get moldy and the milk go bad.  That beer may have plenty of stories, and it can be fun to listen to at parties, but it certainly doesn’t have experience. I’m also pretty sure that it tastes like crap.  I am talking about a beer that tastes like it has the knowledge with living a life well-lived.

Brewery Vivant has been on my radar for a little bit, and I am always interested to see what they have going. You may be able to tell from my previous beer reviews.  And it is not just because I love Belgian style beers.They do seem to take the Belgian styles and add enough creative twists to them to make a nice catalog.  And as someone who enjoys a good canoe trip, I love to see more craft beers in cans.  Now that is not to say that they all twist in a good direction.  Anise? Not in my beer thank you (although for those of you who have been dying to pour a little jager into your beer,  knock yourselves out.  You sick bastards).  But here we have a good example of a beer that certainly seems to know what it is doing. A collaboration between Vivant and New Belgium (I feel like I’m hearing a lot about them all the sudden), that seems to make a good pairing. Speaking of pairing, since they tout this beer as a good one for enjoying with food, I will look forward to finding some nice pairings for this one.  So for a beer with some creative twist here is a creative beer review. Continue reading

 A Cryptic Beer Review

A Cryptic Beer Review of Shock Top End of the World Midnight WheatEnd Of The World Midnight Wheat? Well lookie here.  Has someone at AB/INBEV been putting their thinking caps on and are trying to squeeze out something new, and dare I say it, creative?  Now generally my eyes gloss over when someone mentions Shock Top to me and my brain goes off to a land filled with substandard examples of things I usually enjoy.  But this has been the second time I have been curious about them this year. I had an imaginary conversation with an imaginary Shock Top representative when I heard about the End Of The World Midnight Wheat.

“What is going on over there guys?” I say,

“We are just trying to get your attention.”

“Yeah, I noticed all of the billboards you had plastered about for your lemon shandy this summer.  But, as they say, fool me once…”

“But this time we have something new…er, it is midnight wheat,”

“You’re loosing me.”

“with spices.”


“chocolate malt”

*raises eyebrow*

“and chili!”

“All right, I’ll give you another chance, but just because you know my weakness for chili beer.”

At least, that is how I imagine it going in my head.  But as I told my imaginary Shock Top rep, I do have a fascination with chili beers.  Not that you could say that I really enjoy them, I have never been able to drink more than one.  I don’t find them refreshing at all, but, like my love of spicy food, it is the bite that I just can’t get away from. Now in my beer review, I am going to recommend this beer, but not necessarily because it is good, but because for some people this may be the easiest way for them to get a hold of a chili beer.  It is certainly not the strongest or the best tasting, and the chili flavor only really comes through at the very end, and it is quite light.  Nothing like Ring of Fire from Dragonmead (you always remember your first), but as I said, I think everyone should try a chili beer at least once.  So check out my cryptic beer review of Shock Top’s End of The World Midnight Wheat after the the break. Continue reading

A This Week In Beer Review

Once upon a time there was a mysterious man.  He searched far and wide for new tastes to satisfy him.  He would fins these mysterious brews, and he would drink them, mysteriously.  But he wanted to share his discoveries with the world, so he decided to shout from the top of the tallest mountain in the land.  Mt. Internet.  Being a mysterious man, and drinking mysterious beers, he felt the need to describe them in mysterious ways.  So have a seat and click thru below for my mysteriously cryptic beer review of Flying Dog Brewery‘s Wildeman.
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To tell you the truth I only picked this up because the label really jumped out at me.  Come to think of it, that actually happens quite a bit.  I’d say only about half the time i pick something out because I am looking for a specific style of beer, but the other half really is just based on what catches my eye in the beer cooler.  I can’t imagine I am the only one who experiences this right?  Anyway it really does lead to trying beers that I probably never would have otherwise.  So hooray for bright colors and fancy pictures.  Check out my cryptic review of Brau Brothers Brewing Company’s Hopsession after the break. Continue reading

Welcome back everyone.  I have actually been looking forward to trying this beer for a while now.  I enjoy quite a few of the beers that come from Shmaltz Brewing Company, and I’ve been curious about the beers they produce under the Coney Island label.  So for this week i have for you, the eagerly awaited (at least for me) Cryp0tic Review of Coney Island Freaktoberfest.  check it out below. Continue reading

Welcome to your bonus episode of the day, my cryptic review of Arbor Brewing Company‘s Buzzsaw American IPA.  Have you ever had your judgement shake? It happens all the time.  Sometime i think it is done on purpose, other times it is by accident.  Sometimes you go to a movie, and the trailer had you expecting it to be a buddy crime comedy, and you end up watching Way of the Gun.  Still a good movie, just nothing like what you expected (I hate it when trailers do that, did the people who made it even watch the movie?). or sometimes you get a beer with a buzz-saw-handed beast on the label, that is called, fittingly enough, Buzzsaw, and you get something much more…. all i can call it is, sophisticated.  Check out my review after the break.

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Welcome to This-Last-Five-Months-In Beer! I didn’t mean to leave you hanging, but life has kind of gotten in the way over here.  We are working up to a big announcement, but for right now, I am going to get back to what I know best, making mildly (read not very) amusing reviews about the new craft beers I’ve tried, and hope that even if you can’t quite decipher what I am saying, it piques your curiosity enough to go out and give them a try yourself.  And I really do contend that my descriptions are sound, and do reflect the true taste of the particular beer.

So in honor of my, what seems to be happening far to often, return from extended break, I will present you with…..

wait for it….





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How did you like the Mad Science?  Did anyone try it?  You really should, it was a good surprise.  this week I am back to my less understandable nature.  This beer fits right in with that idea, at least in that i had to try a couple of times to describe just what i was tasting.  I do think I got it in the end.  Brewery Vivant is quickly becoming a pretty strong draw for me.  their different takes on Belgian ales certainly run the gamut.  This time i picked up a can of their Zaison.  That stands out to me too, that they can their beers.  Despite your own feelings on canning, it certainly does helps them to stand out.  Check out my review after the break. Continue reading

Sometimes the best treats are the ones that you don’t expect.  This week I have a cryptic review of a beer from Tri-City Brewing Company out of Bay City, MI.  I have to admit this is not a brewery I am terribly familiar with, I’ve only had a few of their beers, but I am pleased with what I have found. Not that I had any reason to doubt the quality of this beer, but It is just nice to find a pleasant surprise sometimes.  Check out my cryptic review after the break. Continue reading